its been almost six months since i last wrote in this journal.
probably because i have been fine for the last six months.Unfortunately not any more.I still have that problem that i`ve been talking about, and I am starting to wonder whether there is a solution for it.I have tried different ways to tackle it or manage it and have had momentary success but int he end that problem (self inflicted) always comes on top.
few days back i read a quote and i put it on facebook
"I had to be fired to get fired up", now i wonder what the fuck will it take to get me fired up.

I surrender .

I have truely lost the will and energy, the strength and the courage to fight.

I have been a man of intelligence and self respect and confidence for 19 yrs,

Now I am man of self pity, broken confidence and daft decisions.